Where Sunshine and Pollen Wait for Me

     I just got back from Austin.  I had a blast.  I went to visit my sister.  We did fun things, like painting pottery and outlet mall shopping.  But a lot of my time was spent watching my nephew and bro-in-law fight and play xbox.  Then my sister and her husband had a great big ol' fight about the baby, and who is supposed to do things for her.  She's really fuckin' cute, so I loved doing things for/with her.  She's 3 months old, and I absolutely love her.  I told DaVinci that I know babies change things, and that they can complicate things, but I really hope we argue over who gets to bathe the baby because both of us enjoy it.  Screaming crying babies don't piss me off, so I don't understand why my sis and her husband get so mad about it.  It's like our dogs- yeah, walking them is a pain, and no, I don't always want to throw the toys, but it's fun whether I want to do it or not.  I mean, babies don't speak a whole lot of English, and grown-ups don't always read minds, so I understand the fussiness and frustration on both sides.  I just don't understand the anger.  The anger is bad.

     Also, on my trip, I visited EverSmile.  He lives there for school and work.  We met at a Jason's Deli, and had pizza, but I talk too much and didn't get to finish.  Then I got a quick tour of UT, which was, um, fun?  I dunno, it was a quick tour.  I also saw the Lyndon B. Johnson Presidential Library.  Didn't go in, but I thought it was cool anyway.  I've never been to anything Presidential.... and with it being a library that was bigger than I expected (everything's bigger in Texas), I was in awe.  After that we stopped at ToyJoy, an awesome little toy store similar to the one we have uptown here. 
     Then we went to La Casa de EverSmile to watch Muppets Take Manhattan.  I've never seen a muppet movie, ever.  I didn't want to watch a movie I'd rather watch with DaVinci- like something on our list that I know we both want to see, or a romantic movie- because that'd be inappropriate and awkward.  So I decided on Muppets, because, well, I was given the choice.  I fell before we even got inside.  Not even drunk, and I fell out the damn car onto the walkway.  How's that for saying "My life is fine without you and I'm happy now" to an ex?  I landed, of course, on the broken bottle I was carrying.  It was a whole bottle, and became a broken bottle just an instant before I landed on it.  I had glass in my hand, and was given medical attention... tweezers, running water, and a paper towel.  I later found another piece when I got back to my sister's. 
     The movie was good, as good as a muppet movie could have been, I suppose.  The watching was, well, it was pleasant.  Since he's the only ex, or former lover or what-you-will, I am on decent terms with, I'm not sure how to act around him.  Besides, I don't fully trust myself around guys, especially guys I once really cared about.  And he's got a girlfriend.  And I have a husband.  And I don't want to mess up anything.  So, I sat at the edge of the couch, and tried to maintain small talk without getting all panicky and blustery.  There was what felt like an inapproptiate foot rub, and a threat of murder.  He's such a trooper for putting up with me being crazy.  And I kinda missed him for a little bit.  I mean, you know, DaVinci is fantastic and I love him.  I guess my mind started playing the "what-if" game.  Maybe I would have been happy.  But I am happy now, and that's enough for me.  It was nice to see that smile again, and to hear his voice, give him a hug, and to feel validated again.  If it's not love, it's something like it, and it's just as important.